


You're Alive

by katling



Series: Give me a kiss, and to that kiss a score [2]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Angst, M/M, but then fluff, finn is anxious, kalonia is so over these two, poe has bad luck on his missions, poe whump, sorry - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-15
Updated: 2016-06-15
Packaged: 2018-07-15 05:22:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7209542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katling/pseuds/katling
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The next one of my <a href="http://tellmevarric.tumblr.com/post/145321344313/chacah-inquisitorhotpants">types of kisses</a> fics. This one fits into the same universe of my previous fics and kind of follows the first one of this series.</p>
<p>Eleven days, six hours and twenty-eight minutes since Poe’s communications had ceased. Not that Finn had been counting or anything.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You're Alive

**Author's Note:**

> I have very little medical knowledge. The experience in this fic is based on something that happened to a friend of mine. I was a witness to it all so I used it for the fic.

Eleven days, six hours and twenty-eight minutes since Poe’s communications had ceased. Not that Finn had been counting or anything. And from the grim and drawn looks on the faces of Snap and Jessika and Karé and the rest of Poe’s wing, he was not the only one who could give the time down to the minute. Poe had sent them on ahead and each of them wore a hollow-eyed look of guilt and regret that they hadn’t stayed, even though disobeying Poe’s orders in the field wasn’t something they actually ever _did_.

The pilots and Finn had taken to gathering in a corner of the hanger, a little silent group sitting around and staring at the floor or the wall or nothing at all. Every now and then one of them would say something but it was terse and cursory at best and any attempts at conversation died before they could even start. It was driving Finn up the wall and yet he couldn’t sit in his and Poe’s room in solitude either. He wanted to be _doing_ something, preferably going out and finding Poe and rescuing him. He’d done it once, he would be more than happy to do it again, but the General had vetoed any rescue attempts until they had a better idea of what had happened. There were spies out looking, searching for answers, but as the days stretched and no information came in, the tension around the base had ratcheted up into something Finn had never experienced before.

“Was it like this last time?” Finn asked into the silence.

None of the pilots pretended not to know what he was talking about.

“No,” Snap said. “He’d gone on his own that time.”

“We hadn’t _left him behind_ ,” Jess snarled.

None of the other pilots took offence at her anger. They knew she was more angry at herself than at any of them. Besides, they all felt the same. It didn’t matter if the anger was illogical or not.

Silence fell over the group again until it was broken by the sudden whoop of the proximity alerts. As one they stood and rushed out of the hanger, hoping beyond hope that the alerts had nothing to do with the First Order. Hoping beyond hope that they had a lot to do with one Commander Poe Dameron.

“Ground troops, stand down. Repeat. Ground troops, stand down. Approaching friendly.”

Finn put on a burst of speed at the sudden announcement and he pushed his way through the gathering crowd in time to see Black One come limping in for what could charitably be called a heavy landing, though controlled crash might be more accurate. Before he could rush towards the damaged X-Wing, his arm was caught by a grinning Snap.

“Let the ground crew and medics do their job.” The pilot gave Finn a one-armed hug. “He’s alive. Don’t worry about that. BB-8 would have landed it a hell of lot better than that.”

The other pilots laughed and Finn managed a weak smile until he finally saw the medics helping a very battered looking Poe out of the cockpit. Even from this distance, he could see the blood streaking one side of Poe’s face and from the way he was listing heavily to that side, there were more injuries as well. The medics hurried him onto a stretcher and quickly carried him away.

“Come on!” Jessika said, grabbing hold of Finn’s hand.

She dragged him through the base, shoving her way past the impromptu celebrations that had begun, until they reached the medbay. They came to a screeching halt there when the medidroids barred their entrance.

“No visitors,” the droid grated again and again as Jess attempted to find a way past.

“What about Finn?” Jess said, giving up and shoving Finn forward.

The droid paused then slid aside. “Permission has been given for Finn to enter.”

Jess gave him a nudge. “Go on. Let us know when they eventually kick you out, yeah?”

Finn nodded. “Thanks, Jess.”

“Go on,” Jess said with a grin and another gentle shove. “You two are far too adorable for me to not do everything I can to help.”

Finn grinned then hurried into the medbay before the droid could change its mind. It wasn’t hard to find where Poe was. The pilot’s voice, strenuously protesting whatever was being done, was coming from the same room Finn had been in when he was still recovering from his wounds after Starkiller. He tapped on the door frame and peered inside.

Poe was sitting on the bed, his flight suit stripped down to his waist, leaving him a plain white shirt speckled and smeared with grease, dirt and blood. A medidroid was cleaning the blood from his face and treating the wound there while Dr Kalonia ran her scanner over what was quite obviously a dislocated shoulder. Neither the doctor nor the droid looked away from their tasks at the knock but Poe did and he grinned when he saw who was there.

“Finn! Buddy! Come and rescue me again. I’m fine.”

Finn edged his way into the room, being careful to keep out of the way of the medical staff. “Uh,” he said dubiously, nodding towards Poe’s shoulder. “That doesn’t look _fine_.”

“He’s still hyped up on adrenaline so he’s not feeling much pain,” Dr Kalonia said so dryly that Finn suddenly felt like he was back on Jakku again. “Give him ten minutes for it to start wearing off and he’ll be singing a different tune.”

Finn managed a small laugh. He wasn’t sure what he was feeling right now other than sheer relief. He wanted to kiss Poe, he wanted to hug him, he wanted hold on and never let go again. But he also felt frozen and shaken and frightened and angry – though he couldn’t work out what he was angry about or at – and he couldn’t figure out how to say what he wanted to say, so instead he went with, “Is there anything I can do to help?”

Dr Kalonia nodded towards the bed. “Sit next to him and don’t let him run off.”

Finn sat down on the opposite side to where the droid was still working and Poe immediately nudged him with his good shoulder. 

“She’s a worrywart,” Poe said in a confiding manner. “Quick shove and back in it goes. I’ll be fine.”

“I should do that and let you find out how wrong you are,” Dr Kalonia said before Finn could think of a reply. “As it is, you’re a lucky man. Apart from the cut on your head and the dislocated shoulder, you’re remarkably uninjured for a man who’s been missing for _eleven days_.”

The uncharacteristically sharp censure in her voice as she said that last bit seemed to make its way through Poe’s current jagged and agitated mood because his eyes widened and the look he turned on Finn was full of worry and apology.

“Finn… shit. I’m sorry.” He turned his head so that he could rest his forehead against Finn’s shoulder, even as his hand fumbled for Finn’s. “Damn it. It’s a long story but the short version is a First Order scout came out of nowhere and got a lucky shot in just as I was about to go to lightspeed. I killed him but had to land on the planet to do some repairs. The locals were very friendly and helpful right up until I want to leave.” He raised his head and smiled wanly. “Then they got a little forceful about insisting I stay. Something about a bounty. A very _big_ bounty.”

“What?” Finn said worriedly.

“Yeah, apparently the First Order were a bit miffed that I declined their hospitality,” Poe said with a sudden wild grin. Then, as quickly as it had appeared, the grin slid off his face and he paled and winced. “And ow. Um, yeah, okay, that kind of hurts.”

“Is the adrenaline wearing off, Commander Dameron?” Dr Kalonia said with such saccharine sweetness that finally, _finally_ , Finn could laugh properly.

“I think you’re in trouble,” he said in a low tone.

“Nothing new there,” Poe replied ruefully as he leaned more heavily against Finn, his face paling further. “Ow. Damn.”

Dr Kalonia was there a moment later with some pain medication and then the medidroid appeared with a datapad in its hand. She reviewed the scans and nodded in satisfaction.

“You’re a lucky man. There’s no ligament damage so if we’re careful, we’ll be able to put it back in without too much fuss.” She looked over at Finn. “Can you brace him for us? Slide your hand around his ribs and keep him steady and still. Normally I’d do this with him on his back but we can make this work and he’ll be calmer this way.”

Finn nodded and steadied Poe against him the way Dr Kalonia wanted, making sure Poe was braced nice and firmly. The doctor gave him a smile of approval.

“Now, this is going to hurt quite a bit but once it’s done the pain should decrease markedly. Tell me if it doesn’t.”

Poe nodded and the doctor and the droid situated themselves. With Poe properly braced, Dr Kalonia pulled steadily and rotated Poe’s arm. Finn felt the way the pilot stiffened and clenched his jaw tightly, sweat suddenly beading on his forehead. For a moment it looked like it wasn’t working then the shoulder joint suddenly slid back into place and looked normal once again. Poe slumped against him, burying his face against Finn’s neck as he breathed heavily.

“Poe?” Finn asked quietly.

Poe nodded but didn’t move from where he was and his voice was a little slurred when he spoke. “’M okay. It’s okay. Just… fuck… remind me not to do that again.”

“How is your pain level?” Dr Kalonia asked before Finn could reply.

“Better,” Poe said, shifting so he could look at the doctor though he didn’t move any further.

Dr Kalonia gave him a narrow-eyed look then she nodded. “I’m going to get you a sling and some painkillers. If you promise to behave yourself, I’ll let you go back to your quarters.”

“I’ll make sure he does,” Finn said firmly.

The doctor smiled. “Good. I thought you might. I want you to keep an eye on him. That head wound looks like nothing more than a shallow cut but if he develops a headache or his vision blurs or he shows signs of confusion, bring him right back.” She gave Poe a kind if somewhat exasperated look. “Clean him up too. He’s going to be dead on his feet by the time you get him back to his room but he’ll sleep better if he’s clean.”

Finn nodded and, once the sling was on and the little bottle of pills handed over, got Poe to his feet. The pilot leaned heavily on him for a moment before straightening a little and drawing in a sharp breath.

“I’m okay. I can walk,” Poe said.

“Uhuh,” Finn replied as he got them moving, his arm tight around Poe’s waist. “I’m sure you can but let’s try this my way.”

He was momentarily worried when Poe didn’t argue any further but when he glanced over, he saw that Poe was concentrating very hard on where his feet was going. From the tenor of his breathing, he was also in a little more pain that he was willing to admit. Thankfully they weren’t stopped by anyone on their way back to Poe’s… their… room and when the door closed behind them, Poe sighed and went to sit down.

“Nope,” Finn said, catching him around the waist again and steering him towards the fresher. “You’re going to wash. Do you need my help?”

He could see the conflicting emotions run across Poe’s face then the man sighed and slumped a little.

“Yeah.”

With gentle hands, Finn helped Poe strip off his filthy flight suit, boots and shirt before finally removing the sling and reminding him to be _careful_. Poe then stumbled into the fresher, insisting he could wash himself without any help, and Finn sat down on the side of the bed. And the moment he relaxed, everything hit him like a sledgehammer.

Poe was alive. He was _alive_. A little battered and the worse for wear but he was _alive_. That interminable, terrible, seemingly _endless_ eleven days, six hours and however many minutes of fearing the worst had ended and Poe was _alive_. The tears caught Finn by surprise but once they started, he could seem to make them stop and he sat on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands and simply wept with relief. He didn’t hear the fresher stop and the door open and only realised that Poe was there when he felt a hand pulling gently at one of his.

“Hey,” Poe said softly. “Hey, Finn… buddy. What’s wrong?”

Finn raised his head. “You’re alive.”

Poe froze for a moment then a wave of understanding crashed over him. He wrapped his hand around the back of Finn’s neck and pulled him closer so that he could kiss his forehead. He pressed a series of kisses all over Finn’s face in between murmuring halfway coherent reassurances then he finally captured Finn’s mouth in a long, sweet kiss.

“I’m alive,” he said when they finally parted. “I’ll always fight to get back to you. Always. No matter what happens. Just never give up on me, yeah?”

Finn gave a soft, lightly shaky laugh. “Never. The General wouldn’t let me come after you. Said we needed more information.”

“She was right,” Poe said, cradling Finn’s face with his good hand. “I mean, I know we have this thing with half-assed escape plans and all that but information’s good too.”

Finn managed a more genuine laugh this time. “I told her I’d rescued you once before and I was going to do it again. She got this _look_ on her face.”

“A good look or a bad look?” Poe asked with something a bit closer to his normal grin.

“I don’t know,” Finn replied then he realised that Finn was kneeling on the floor in front of him, still slightly damp from the fresher and… buck naked. “Poe?”

Poe’s grin was a wonderful mix of mischief and embarrassment. “Apparently you need two hands to wrap a towel round your waist. Who knew?” The embarrassment faded and his grin turned to one of pure mischief and more than a little lust and desire. “We could take advantage of that?”

Finn was tempted. _Stars_ but he was tempted. There was nothing more that he wanted to do right now than lay Poe out on their bed and make sure he was alright, that he was here, that he was alive, with his own hands and – he felt his face heat at the thought – his mouth. To touch and kiss every inch of that skin and reassure them both that Poe was _here_. But behind the mischief and the worry and the desire and everything else in Poe’s eyes, he could see the bone-deep weariness and the edges of pain so all he did was shake his head.

“Maybe later,” he said. “Come on. Bed.”

Poe leered at him but accepted the help to get to his feet and put the sling back on then he gently collapsed onto the bed with a sigh of sheer relief. He wriggled around, wincing occasionally when he jarred his shoulder, but he was soon sprawled on his back under the covers Finn had pulled up.

“Mmmm, bed,” Poe mumbled. Now that he was horizontal and comfortable, his exhaustion had taken its opportunity to ambush him and he was already mostly asleep. He rallied enough to wave his good hand at Finn. “C’mere. Tired. Wanna cuddle.”

Finn gave a sharp laugh that he bit off as quickly as he could. He wondered how many nightmares this was going to give him and realised it wasn’t going to be the last time this might happen. And that if he took up one of the many positions he had been offered, maybe it might be him in Poe’s position and Poe in his. That was a sobering thought and one he didn’t want to dwell on right now so when Poe whined and waved his hand again, he settled willingly into the bed with the pilot. He turned to face the other man, perhaps to say something, he didn’t know, but in the time it had taken him to lie down, Poe had fallen asleep. Finn smiled fondly, kissed Poe’s cheek then settled down to get some sleep. Thoughts about the future and what it might – or might not – bring could wait until they’d both slept.


End file.
